New York Conspiring To Commit Shenanigans

WTF, New York? W. T. F. Ever since Eliot Spitzer, that place has been nothing but salty language, domestic violence and ethics violations. THIS ISN'T A FRAT PARTY, PEOPLE. Are you trying to get Sarah Palin elected? Do you want all the sick babies to die??? Was the state of New York looking to get the GOP an early Christmas present and thought, "You know what they'd really like? Congress." Just pool in for a leopard print Snuggie and call it a day. 

Bad News For Earth: Some People Actually Like Dick Cheney

At the Conservative Political Action Conference (CPAC), everyone agrees that Dick Cheney is a GOD. It's one thing to get a little sentimental about Bush who was more stupid than evil, but Cheney's maleficence is one of the more well-documented evils of our time. Have conservatives really forgotten that this man was one of the main inspirations for hatred and mockery of the Republican party? Will they get behind anything with a famous name and a boner for Reagan? Or do they just miss torture? [USA Today]

John Edwards Promised Rielle Hunter Marriage; Dave Matthews Band

Andrew Young is the guy that tried to save John Edwards' career by claiming to be the father of Edwards' love child with his videographer mistress, Rielle Hunter. He also used to be Edwards' main man, bff, confidante, right hand dude, etc., but it's safe to say those days are over: His new book, "The Politician," is poised to finish the job that "Game Change" started, in terms of making everyone hate John Edwards for being a lying, philandering, pandering slime ball. "The Politician" reveals that Edwards used sketchy socialite money to fund his affair, apparently can't wait for Elizabeth to die from the cancer, and called Rielle Hunter a "crazy slut" upon hearing that she was pregnant. The best part, so far, though, is this little gem:

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