The other day I misspelled "goes" as "gos" and thought to myself: Wow, I am dumb! Then I saw this guy:

This guy misspelled "in." See the rest here, it really is good for one half hour+ of laffs. [Teabonics]

Obama Skipping Important Vacay For Stupid Healthcare Vote

Writers say the dumbest things. (I should know.) Take Ben Smith, who according to his Wikipedia page, is something called a “journalist.” Today he published the following on his Politco.com blog:

If Obama gets a health care bill -- and even if he doesn't -- this Spring will mark a major transformation in his approach to governing, as I mentioned yesterday…

…A reader notes how dramatic, in the context of those reversals, is his decision to cancel his trip to Asia. At the crucial moment in 2008, it was Obama's decision not to suspend his campaign when McCain did that cemented the perception that he was ready for the presidency. At the time, this was his rationale:

"It is going to be part of the president's job to deal with more than one thing at once."

Uh, whata?

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Obama's Secret Plan To Abort Senior Citizens

While McCain is focusing on his personal conspiracy to fatten Americans for the purpose of eating them, Obama is pouring all of his energy into aborting old people. According to this one bumper sticker, Obama already aborted all the babies while you were busy playing your XBox. So, it may be too late to win that fight, but you can still affix this sticker to your car in time to save Grandma before she "gets run over by a reindeer" with only Nancy Pelosi and Joe Biden as witnesses.

If you need convincing, head over to Take A Stand Bumper Stickers and immerse yourself in some dude's background story about why he wants to impeach Obama:

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Sarah Palin On Newsweek Cover: "OMG FML"

 

Sarah Palin is so mad at Newsweek. They put her on the cover in a running outfit instead of one of her eleventy billion dollar suits. IT IS SO SEXIST, she facebooked. (And here I thought making rape victims pay for their own rape kits was sexist.)

I'm one of those feministy types who will point out sexist rhetoric on a Kraft macaroni box, and even I'm struggling here. Sure, she's wearing shorts and her stance is more pageant queen-y than serious politician-y, but I'm guessing that's kind of the point of the article. And considering that she holds no official position, a leisure outfit seems fairly appropriate. 

The funny thing is, if they showed her at home baking a pie, she probably wouldn't even understand the inherent sexism. Luckily we know that our Sarah is a Serious Thinking Person, so we can be 100% sure that she's not throwing out baseless accusations to distract us from the headline, which basically calls her a useless wad of suckage sent from hell to destroy us all. 

[CSM]

The Last Mono Blog: What Doing Nothing Taught Me About Everything

 

Tomorrow marks my return to society, which is lucky for society because frankly, it seems things are a little shaky. To commemorate my tenure on the couch and properly honor my victory over mono, here are exactly nine (9) relevant facts I've learned whilst wasting away these past two weeks! Write these down. Copy and paste these: 

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Joe Lieberman Sucks At Stuff; No Surprise There

Sen. Joe Lieberman (Conn.) on the Senate floor. At the full moon, he shapeshifts into a crying baby.You know that feeling you get when someone says "I just wanna be with you," and you realize later that what they really meant was "I'm drunk, and I have no interest in dating you long-term, but I'd really like to continue sleeping with you and accepting your emotional validation until I find someone who I really want to commit to and/or you have nothing left to give. Oh, and pick up some cigs on the way over?" And you're like, "Well, I probably should have figured that out sooner." It's the same duh feeling you had when you found out balloon boy was a hoax. Well, that's how I'm feeling about the uproar over this whole 'Joe Lieberman shocks everyone by being a douchebag about the public option' business. CLICK TO READ MORE...

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New Yorkers On Snowstorm: Wah Wah Wah

Oh, how adorable: A crosswalk signal dusted with flurries

Apparently it's What-the-Fuck Tuesday here at Hayley's Comment, probably because all the real news is too bleak to mention. The latest to make assholes of themselves are the New Media Elite over at Gawker. Gawker writers are tuff because they are a new species than can actually make a living blogging, and they live in New York on a "per click" salary which is very dangerous and daring in these precarious times. HOWEVER. They are just a bunch of pansies! KEEP READING...

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